Becoming a first time mom can feel isolating at times, especially if you are the only one in your friend group with a child. I clearly remember wondering if my nextdoor neighbor, a mom with a little boy the same age as mine, was sitting in her living room wondering and feeling the same way I was. Around that same time, I watched a documentary that discussed the importance of community, for not only the child but also the mother; it specifically addressed how two mothers, one living a floor above the other, feel incredibly lonely and isolated but would never know that they are not alone in the journey after all.
This image broke my heart because it was my reality.
The struggle to make mom friends is all too real for many moms. We are all looking for someone to align with; often times, moms turn to social media and apps to connect. There are a multitude of apps and groups available for moms to connect: Peanut, Mush, MomCo, Smile mom, First Moms Club, HelloMamas, Circle of Moms, and the plethora of Facebook groups. The number of apps and groups highlights the need and desire all moms have to find a tribe and belong.
I still struggle to make mom friends, and more often than not, I feel like I am dating, which leaves me feeling awkward and uncomfortable. Add scheduling conflicts, and commitments, and the whole situation feels impossible.
Finding quality mom friends takes a willingness to leave the house and your comfort zone. For the first year of my son’s life, I filled every day with activities because I was desperate, and I mean DESPERATE, to make a mom friend. Eventually, after what seemed like a year, I made some friends, but it took pushing my socially awkward self out of the comfortable cocoon I call my home.
You can make mom friends on social media and apps, but it is a whole lot easier to make genuine connections in person.
I encourage you to invite another mom, maybe someone you see often but do not have the courage to talk to, to a play date. Not only will you feel less lonely, but I’m willing to bet the feeling is mutual.
Have you experienced the struggle to make mom friends? Tell me about it in the comments below.